


Mighty Fears

by conceptstage



Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [96]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Headcanon, Meta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-23 13:29:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21320947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: A M9's greatest fears
Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [96]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1436668
Comments: 3
Kudos: 71





	Mighty Fears

Jester’s biggest fear is ending up alone. Not romantically, although the worry that no one will ever love her that way does appear in her mind some nights when she can’t sleep. She’s scared that the people she cares about will leave her or be taken away. She’s scared of ending up locked in a cell like she was at Lorenzo’s hideout but without anyone to come after her or miss her when she’s gone. Even at her loneliest, before she had the Traveler, before she had the Mighty Nein, she always had her momma. She’s scared that someday soon she will have no one at all.

If you asked anyone else, they would say that Nott’s biggest fear is water or drowning. And yeah, water is a demon, created solely to murder people, and yeah, everyone who gets in the water dies instantly (if you were to ask Nott), but that’s not her biggest fear. Her biggest fear is leaving the people who need her behind. It’s not dying, not exactly, although that’s part of it. She’s scared of not being there when the people who rely on her need her the most. 

Caleb has many fears. He would be the first to call himself a coward. He’s scared of fire, of the monsters they fight, of the shadows in his dreams, of himself sometimes... Most of the time. But his biggest fear is one that he will never say out loud, even as he lists all his faults to people who love him despite them. He’s scared of what he’s capable of becoming. He’s scared of looking in the mirror and seeing Trent Ikithon’s eyes on his own face. He’s scared that he’s capable of regressing to that same kid who locked his parents in the house and lit a match. He’s scared that these people who he has come to love like family, like sisters and brothers, will burn and that he will be the one who stoked the flame.

Fjord is scared of ghosts. He’s scared of little girls alone at the end of long, dark hallways, he’s scared of creatures with human faces whose heads turn all the way around, he’s scared of being possessed because that would be the topper on an already shit situation for sure. There’s other things he’s scared of, more serious things. He’s scared of being a failure. He’s scared that being his true self won’t be good enough. He’s scared that he doesn’t have it in him to make Vandren proud. He’s scared that that’s why his parents dropped him off and never came back for him. But yeah, on his list of fears, ghosts are at the top.

Caduceus seems fearless. That’s not on purpose, little about him is done with intent. He doesn’t like to linger in fear. It happens, as most things in nature do, for a reason and he accepts that. It’s a protective instinct that all animals have to some degree. And so he lets his body move through the motions of fear; increased heart rate, sweat, heightened alertness, tense muscles. And then, when the fear subsides, he lets anything lingering with it roll off his skin.

Yasha isn’t scared of the world. She’s not scared of dying or falling or flying or fire or water. Everything that she fears are things that she finds within herself everyday. There’s evil inside her, she can feel it. She’s scared of giving into it someday, of the things she’d be capable of if she did, of people she would hurt, of the lives she would destroy. She carries the fear around with her, like a lead paperweight in her chest, and she uses it to make herself stronger. If she can stand against the evil inside her own body there is nothing that she can’t withstand. Nothing.

If you asked Beau what she was scared of she wouldn’t be able to give you something specific. She has fears, certainly, but they’re hard to give names to, hard to describe in a concrete way. She’s scared of not liking herself. Of giving in to the expectations given to her at her birth and becoming the kind of person who has always hated people like her. She’s scared of dying alone, of having no one notice the empty space she’d leave behind. She’s scared that the people she loves would be better off without her. She scared that someday they’ll figure that out and cut the dead weight. She’s scared of leading them into something they can’t come back from. Of watching them die and knowing that it was her fault. And so, if you asked Beau what she was scared of, she’d smirk and say ‘I’m not fucking scared of anything.’


End file.
